Eliyes

There is a story. It's called "How Superboy Got His Groove Back". It's an issue of Kon-el's first on-going series. It introduces a new costume. It has a random tachikoma toy. It has a lot of funny moments.

It murders Kon's character.

The premise of the story is that Kon feels he's lost his cool. He's losing himself in work but actually kind of apathetic about it in that he's really not feeling much joie de vivre. Considering he'd just had a really incredibly crappy few months -- almost died, got stuck at apparent age of 16 for life, replaced by evil clone and teammates didn't notice, girlfriend murdered while hugging him, regained ability to age, lost powers, was enslaved again (this time by space aliens), best friend/sister figure nearly died, got powers back... Superman suggests that Kon is focussing on the things he can control in his life (his work, his image) to avoid dealing with the stuff he can't control and his emotions, etc., but he shouldn't take how people see him so much to heart since he is not his image. Or something like that. Kon doesn't get the message, really. Instead he goes to the snobby hipster who's dissing of him triggered this particular teenage freakout and asks her to help him get his mojo back. After a lot of really intensive programming in being an aloof sarcasmo steeped in the very latest pop culture, Kon ends up with a new costume, turns down the girl's advances on the basis of her being "superficial, shallow, and not a very nice person" who doesn't actually care about the guy behind the costume. We get a panel that implies that she intended him to do that, as a final proof he has his mojo back, and then we have him cheerily bantering with some monster primates pre-fight and are supposed to accept that he's really got his groove back.

It's all kind of forced, though. He's not actually happy. The very next issue is called "Rage". It starts with Kon beating the shit out of training robot dopplegangers of the Justice League, actually impaling the Bat-bot, which gets him some understandable flack from his trainer, Guardian. He smartmouths The Wall, and then screams insults at her. He says incredibly unkind things to Serling, with whom he shares an attraction (but he previously asked her if they could not pursue it until he could get his head on straight about losing Tana), a friendship, and a working relationship. People go around making comments about how he needs to show some fucking compassion, and if it weren't a .cbr I would throw down the comic in disgust.

Yes, he's grieving. I understand that. He met Tana when he was two days old and fell for her like a sack of bricks off a bridge, and loved her from that moment on, and then couldn't save her from having her head blown off when he was holding her in his arms. I understand that he has issues! He has a right to be angry and fucked up! But Superboy -- this Superboy -- has two overriding character traits: his stubborn refusal to give up even in the face of insurmountable odds*, and his compassion. At this point he is experienced enough to know that dodging the bolt from the bad guy means looping back to save the civilians who might get hit by it. At this point he has let Batman strap him to a nuclear bomb that is going to go off with him on it in the hope of saving the world. At this point he has fucking proved he knows how to think and be sensitive and just arrrrrgh! *tears at hair*

I liked Kon. I liked his innate goodness. I liked his "boy scoutiness". But no. They had to make him an "edgy", aloof ragaholic in a darker-schemed leather costume who alienates all his friends and colleagues and fans and GEE, I WONDER WHY THE BOOK GOT CANCELLED.

*points at DC* I'm watching you. This new Superboy on-going is actually fairly promising, but the Teen Titans book seems to have a lot of frigging bullshit. Don't fuck this up, again.


* "You were fighting an enemy you couldn't touch and who repeatedly caused you excruciating pain -- but you didn't give up. That's heroism."

Author and fic not named to protect the hideously guilty.

I was reading this SGA fic, set after "The Return (Part 1)" where John is looking for a place to live in Colorado Springs --

-- COLORADO SPRINGS --

-- and John for some reason is having trouble finding a place that's "on a hill". A hill. In Colorado Effing Springs!

DID THEY THINK THAT CHEYENNE MOUNTAIN WAS JUST STANDING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE PLAINS ON ITS OWN?!

WAS WIKIPEDIA DOWN THAT DAY?!

Dan DiDio spoke at a con, and asked his audience, "How many of you actually understood Final Crisis?" He got the people who indicated they had to stand up because apparently they're his "idols".

THIS IS NOT A SIGN OF GOOD STORYTELLING.

I know a lot of people have stopped reading DC and won't pick up 52, but I am not one of them. (A fact which lakidaa keeps forgetting, so she keeps spoiling me on things I haven't bought yet or am about to read. BAD. BAD LAKIDAA. Stop that. B| )

Even though DC has killed off characters I loved or at least liked, done terrible things to the Titans, new and old. (I loved Jericho. What they've done is a travesty.) Even though DC has replaced the Legion wholesale with a group of backstabbing, lying, hateful, self-righteous, bland teenagers whining about being bored and oppressed who have never suffered at all compared to any other version of the Legion. (I enjoy picturing how they would be so utterly horrified by Jazmin's thong. Or Laurel's thong. Or Rokk's corset. Reimagined = swathed in lathers of cloth!)

Even though DC has done all of that, the writing is still leagues better than Marvel's! Because I can still recognise most of the characters! Because I can still like any of the characters! Because people respond to things at least somewhat realistically!

Meanwhile, Marvel has characters I love. Or loved; frankly, I can't hardly recognise them anymore. It's not just that they screw over only the characters I like, they screw over everyone, and they ignore their own continuity without even saying "retconning this". I've been researching stuff that was published 2002-2003 (for fic purposes) because at the time I wasn't reading it and they did a bunch of stuff with characters I like that I figured I should check.

I am so, so glad I did not buy those. They make me angry. If I began to list all the things that just don't make any sense, I would be here all day. That's not how I want to spend my day off, though, so I won't -- But I just seriously wonder somethings, like do the editors even check the continuity? There used to be little continuity "this is what they're referring to" footnotes from the editor. Now there's just glaring inaccuracies. Oh, and how many Wolverines are there, currently? Because the one in Avengers -- who acts like a parody of Wolverine mixed with Homer Simpson or something -- seems to exist at the same time as the one in X-Men. Maybe the X-books are just separate from the rest of the universe now? Except for how they crossover with She-Hulk here or Spiderman there, they don't seem to be affected by the rest of the universe, and the rest of the universe seems oblivious to their Enormous World-Altering Events.

Are the X-Men even in the same world as Civil War? Are the X-Men (possibly) participating in Civil War the same ones as in Uncanny X-Men? Is Civil War even going into canon? What about the zombies? None of this seems clear. The only thing I know is that the Ultimate universe is a separate continuity.

It's pretty sad when it's only the line clearly marked "THIS IS AN AU" that makes much sense continuity-wise.

But, as my anger seems to fuel my masochism when it comes to stuff like this, I am going to the comic store today and picking up ordering, since it is not out yet despite it being January 30th, X-Men Annual #1 (January 2007), despite the fact that the primary characters are Mystique and Rogue, who I can no logner stand, the secondary character is Cable, who I never liked, adn it's supposedly kicking off the biggest story arc they've ever done with the mutants. Okay, despite but also partially because of that last. You see, it's going to do something very important with Northstar and Aurora. Also apparently Exodus and the Acolytes aren't dead anymore. And I need to see.

But DC is still doing better.